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Date Written: September 17, 2017

a relationship is indesirable

instead i view each personal interaction as an infinitesimal

i want every possible one of these infinitesimal interactions

but not even then will i reach that relationship

that magic number one

see i could have relationships containing five hundred times the emotion of others

containing love of an almost infinite concentration

but never infinite

see you could say you want the both of both worlds

i want the best of all worlds

as does she

however far from my idea of never reaching one

one – is her ultimate desire

one to feel whole 

one to feel alive

excited she will race picking up infinitesimally small relationships in a constant measure

like a hamster on its wheel she cannot


never should realise

its unending.

she can have her girlfriend, her friends, her better than friends, her best friends

her lovers

but even as she furiously grabs at it, clutching

nil poi

0 points

no points

no point in it, she smiles

because even as she strikes forward vaxatiously

she thinks shes winning, that she is getting closer to her one!

the one she deserves! right?


because people like us do not deserve the one

we deserve eachothers company as we wander mindlessly

she may be stupid and foolish

but in her own way she is

infinitesimally beautiful

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