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Goodbye

Date Written: October 2, 2017
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Today, I watched you leave, and I could not find it in me to breathe.  As you left I began to think about what we could be and it was not until today that I realized, we were meant to be. 

Whether we were happy or not I never imagined what it would feel like to lose the one I loved, I never imagined what it would be like to watch all I ever wanted walk away, but it happened and when it did it was all at once.

When I was younger I wanted to be bold, I wanted to grow old with someone who laughed at my jokes. 

Your voice grew thunderous as you said you couldnt stay and those words rumbled in my chest, the lightning struck my throat as I could not find the words to say.  But its over now, and I wonder if at night you watch the same stars that I do.  I wonder if during the day you search for my face in the crowd of people we see everyday.  Because I know I do.  

I always thought that I would see you alone.  But you have grown. Maybe I do not want to see you happy maybe I do not want to see you without me, maybe just maybe I do not want to ever let go. 

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