Was it really love?

How do I tell someone I love that they are hurting me. How do I forgive them, But do they really deserve my forgiveness? And how do I just forget everything they had put me through. Why am I never good enough? And why does it always has to be this difficult. Does loving someone really hurts this much? Am I even in love? Why can't I just forget about him. why can't I just stop loving him. And why do I even love him. But what about the pain I am feeling right now. What about the day I stood there standing in front of the theater holding two tickets in my hand, all happy and excited waiting for him. And I waited and waited, stood there people watching. Just for him to say that he wouldn't make it. What about the nights I needed him, but he had more important things to do. What about the days I just wanted him to hear me but he had a lot going on. When is it ever going to be about me? And still my stupid heart forgives him. Is this really love?? A part of me knew our love was dead. Everything had changed, especially him. It's like we didn't even know each other. We were together just for the sake of being together. Or were we really together? The things I do for him don't I even deserve half of that? I changed from the person I used to be just for the sake of being loved. Don't I deserve to be loved? Where did the love go? Days when we couldn't live without each other. Days when it was just us and nothing else mattered. Days when everything seemed to be perfect. Days when life left like a movie. And now it's like he's here, but I am not. I feel numb. Do I even exist? I don't even remember how I used to sound like. I lost myself trying to become who I was never really meant to be. A part of me was still hoping that things could get better. I kept quite so I could keep him. But what about me? it was never really about me. And I guess it was never really love.