pennies

pennies

a two-faced monster -
a head, a tail -
which one is better?
which one is worse?

then the extra layer-
the one with shame-
and doubt, and fear-

should i be feeling twice as much?
the good, the bad-
all mixed up-

a penny for your thoughts, they ask -
and i don’t know -
where to start -
the good, the bad?
the in-between?

instead i say -
oh nothing -
i’m just fine today -
along they go their merry way -

my monster fighting -
head and tail -
eating itself from the inside out -
as shame and fear and doubt return -
a pretty penny worth of thoughts -
eating me out of my mind.