Analysis of Illusion of love

Today I wrote our eulogy.
And even in the face of death,
I find myself in the grief stages, holding on to fading memories.
What was mere months felt like we looped through centuries.
Like an ongoing erotic sequel
Our souls embodied the unique print that concluded our trilogy.
A never-ending art.
Captives of the void, toxic by choice!
Yet the sound of your voice
Makes a sick heart rejoice
Reset...
I wondered if we will ever get it right?
Indulgence, ignoring all the red flags in sight.
We both know we’re no good for each other.
Yet still, my heart bargains with itself
Asking, "why can’t I be your lover?"
It not just the gyrating of hips.
Or the acrobatic tips
It’s the connection I felt outside the taste of your lips.
It’s the present of your presence.
The gazing stares
The laughter we share
It’s any and everything I have experienced that was once not there.
And though I fought to show you that I cared
You’ve brought me face to face with my deepest fears
Which was your distance that fumigates my air.
We’ve been demoted from friends and entered strangers' lair.
Into the abyss goes my tears.
Bidding farewell to this Unrequited love affair
That left me with such countless inquiries and a heart loaded up with despair.