Analysis of Departure, Desired

Douglas Blair 1951 (London)



He had a good meal
Mid afternoon
Sunday.
Eight of family present.
Excepting Stewart away
At Vancouver
Master’s studies.
Pop had read to all
Psalm 121.
Mostly from memory.
Voice strained.
Hardly audible.
Gram gone these
Past five years.
Pop pursued his novels
And crosswords.
Staying sharp until
Eyes failed with macular.
This quietened him.
Like some different man.
He wanted to go.
Had told Doc Bradley
As much.
Eighty-nine years.
No meds for the last ten days.
No severe pains.
Only an insistent stupour.
All parties adjourned
To Den.
Pop wheeled upstairs
Smiling at each in turn.
Crisp bedsheets ready.
Elder daughter gave the kiss.
Gone with grace.
Six twenty.
Nothing more said.
Bruce the mortician
Already knew.

(Note. I am reading a novel by prize winning Portuguese author Jose Saramago. What if all the people of an un-named country woke up New Year’s Day. And could not die? Would just stay as they were. A sort of quirky eternal life. Good development or bad? Title Death at Intervals.)


Scheme XXAXABCXXDXXCEFXXBXXXDXEXXBXXXXDXXDXXX F
Poetic Form
Metre 11011 101 1 1110010 101001 1010 1010 11111 1 101100 11 10100 111 111 101110 01 10101 1111 111 111001 11011 11110 11 1011 1110111 1011 1010101 11001 11 1101 101101 1110 1010101 111 110 1011 10010 0101 11110010111010101111101011111011111011111111001110010110100111011100
Closest metre Iambic trimeter
Characters 1,003
Words 199
Sentences 35
Stanzas 2
Stanza Lengths 38, 1
Lines Amount 39
Letters per line (avg) 20
Words per line (avg) 4
Letters per stanza (avg) 394
Words per stanza (avg) 85
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Written on January 11, 2023

Submitted by dougb.72572 on January 11, 2023

Modified by dougb.72572 on January 12, 2023

59 sec read
21

Douglas Blair

Blogging poems since 2008. Once a lawyer in general practice. Then 32 years as Shipper in a heavy metal fabricating plant. Retired 2022. Married and father of two. Poet. Hiker. Harmonica Busker. Gospel enthusiast. Photographer. http://shootdempix.blogspot.com/ more…

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