Analysis of Bond, James Bond (shaken not stirred)

The bad guys with the
Assault weapons
Miss him every time.
He has a hand gun.
One shot and
Three thugs drop.
While the fortress alarms scream
Out their disapproval.
James Bond.

He always has strange
Alter egos.
Bird watcher.
Salesman.
Attache to the Ambassador.
Guns merchant.
Tourist who knows
Everything about everywhere.
James Bond.

Hooks up with same
CIA man in the field
Every case.
Felix Leiter.
Felix perseveres so that he
Can kick the bucket
Same time as Bond, James Bond.

Women, always women
Gorgeous, professional Phd
Scantily clad women.
Close to the Big Boss Villain.
Drops each for the handsome Brit.
And runs/drives all over
With Commander Bond.
Motorbikes, specially featured cars
Airplanes, choppers, launch motor boats.
Some wacky vehicle.
(vehicle design by Q)
Eventually assaults, destroys
The Master Fortress of Darkest Evil.
James Bond.

I am tired from all of this.
Need to go to bed.
But not with any hopped up
Bond Girl, ripe for the sack.
Not tonight girl.
Blair, Doug Blair, that is.

(Fade to smooth easy music
Video of women swimming
In coloured inks. Always smiling
Never suffering costume failure.
Alluring. Can’t be apprehended.)

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