Analysis of growing pains

My daddy once said “ forever is a long time “
little did i know he was right
come to the age nine,  
he died  
i cried
but i tried to find pride in life.

Age 16 now, i think im doing fine.
only now the thoughts break down my spine
wrapping around like an over grown vine

Finally taking the weight off my shoulders
cover up my scars so i cant get colder
realizing
 analyzing
that its fantasizing what i can do as i get older
putting myself to rest
is for being closer to death
so for now, i must reinvent myself to be the best.
i must get up, get dressed, see that im blessed
i just have a couple things to get off my chest
but times moving slowly so im controlling where these thoughts go as im growing.