Anxious

I’m living in hell
So that means I’m heaven bound
All these years
I held it down
Life sometimes feel
Like it was a riddle
Gotta slow it down
Maybe just a little

Think about
Lack of memories
Don’t acknowledge me
Don’t even
Recognize me
We Facebook friends
But you never existed
That’s ancient history
Win your battles
That’s facing victory
This poetry magically
Sentences come automatically
Living life tragically
Drained from all my energy
Burst like a cannon
Fully semi automatically
You read my thoughts
Did that unintentionally
I usually don’t do that
Normally
I’ve cried tears like typhoons
Now my soul aches
Uncontrollably
Mending pretending
Sorting through fakes
Without them life would
Be cake

Anxious heart beating
Everyday I’m fighting
Inner demons
Cursed through out
All of the 4 seasons
Pain is worth It
Only if I  get even
Money stays bleeding
From early morning
Till late evenings
Vampire mode
Family time depleted
Time slowly deleted
I lasted this long
Still nobody here to
Believe it
Bad news
I’ll dispose of it
Money looking good
Now I see why
Money makes you
Act the total opposite
Accounts stay negative
I keep my Benjamin’s
Locked in a safe
Like a fugitive
My style stays exclusive
I catch mistakes
So I don’t make
Any more excuses
I’m the reason why
You burned off those fuses
Destined to win
Tired of all these losers