Wager of sin

-Wager Of Sin-

I hide behind the drugs in my system so when my spirit it talks I don't have to listen. They keep me from myself and being my best, my heart and my soul dormant in my chest.

 Lost in myself I process these feelings with sleepless unrest, just like your body, your spirit it bleeds, when you don't give it to love and the care that it needs. It will ruin your life bring you to your knees alone in yourself with your cries and your pleas distraught at the thought of this powerful disease.

 It's 11:00 p.m. in the dark I sit with a hole in my heart and this bottomless pit reflecting on the choices that brought me to this, the addict inside told me it would be fun, now my spiritual self lay half dead and numb.

 A slave to the needle I was on quite the run Russian roulette with the half loaded gun.
 
So much loss for so little gain, i traded it all for so much pain. Now look where it's led me, it's culminated to this, trap behind prison Walls in this endless abis with feelings of emptiness where something's amiss.

I had thought to myself, "If don't clean up my act I'll go right back to prison",  but that's the wager of sin and one last bad decision!   
                                  - Joseph Ernest Jr
                     Coyote ridge correction center
                                        10/22/2019