Wager of sin



-Wager Of Sin-

I hide behind the drugs in my system so when my spirit it talks I don't have to listen. They keep me from myself and being my best, my heart and my soul dormant in my chest.

 Lost in myself I process these feelings with sleepless unrest, just like your body, your spirit it bleeds, when you don't give it to love and the care that it needs. It will ruin your life bring you to your knees alone in yourself with your cries and your pleas distraught at the thought of this powerful disease.

 It's 11:00 p.m. in the dark I sit with a hole in my heart and this bottomless pit reflecting on the choices that brought me to this, the addict inside told me it would be fun, now my spiritual self lay half dead and numb.

 A slave to the needle I was on quite the run Russian roulette with the half loaded gun.
 
So much loss for so little gain, i traded it all for so much pain. Now look where it's led me, it's culminated to this, trap behind prison Walls in this endless abis with feelings of emptiness where something's amiss.

I had thought to myself, "If don't clean up my act I'll go right back to prison",  but that's the wager of sin and one last bad decision!   
                                  - Joseph Ernest Jr
                     Coyote ridge correction center
                                        10/22/2019

About this poem

When once again I found myself in the place we're actions and consequences meet, state prison. That first night, the disappointment, the unrelenting sence of foreboding and the introspective interpretation of my current circumstances..this was what I wrote on that cell wall that stormy night...

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Written on October 22, 2019

Submitted by thejoetoknow4444 on May 08, 2022

Modified on March 05, 2023

1:18 min read
14

Quick analysis:

Scheme X X X X A X ABBX
Characters 1,338
Words 253
Stanzas 7
Stanza Lengths 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 4

Joseph Ernest Jr

32yr old man from Seattle/Tacoma Washington. Who faced imesurable adversity since a child but who's resilience is unparalleled and despite seemingly insurmountable obstacles has persavered rising above falling victim to statistics, he emerged unencumbered by past mistakes and previouse failures. Fueled by those experiences he embarks on a spiritual journey of self discovery while vowing to share his wisdom and story so to prove to others it's possible and show that your current circumstances do not define you. more…

All Joseph Ernest Jr poems | Joseph Ernest Jr Books

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    "Wager of sin" Poetry.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 31 Oct. 2024. <https://www.poetry.com/poem/126224/wager-of-sin>.

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